Haiku #170 - Dallas, TX

please play on the grass
between all the interstates
don't mind if i do


My parents freak out a little about walking on green grass.  This is because A) they both grew up in the desert Southwest where anyone who cares for their feet steers clear of the "grass" and B) they lived for several years in Cambridge, England where something horrible and British would befall them if they dared to step on the grass.  I thought of them when I saw this sign near the opera house in Dallas.  

Haiku #169 - Mexican Drag Show

where I learned to say
"mátame, tequila, que-el
amor no pudo!"


("kill me, tequila, 'cause love couldn't!") - Carlos, our new swing, taught me this phrase.  

A bunch of us went out tonight to a place called Barcadia to hang out with some people from Young Frankenstein, who are also in town and came to our show.  Giancarlo and Marcus went down the street to find food, and Cherie and I followed suit.  Little did we know what we were getting ourselves into - Oscar Palacios y el Show Extasis.  I've seen plenty of drag shows in New York, but never a Texican drag show. 
I texted this picture to Kurt back at Barcadia, and he and the rest of the gang showed up soon after and stayed to close down the joint.  

Haiku #161-164 - International Women's Day

I rarely post anything political.  I have friends from all over the political spectrum, and I love and respect them, even when I may not agree with them. Recently, though, after a long hiatus from reading the news, I've been riveted by numerous disturbing stories about women in this country, their rights, and the war being waged on them.  

Here are some haiku with links to recent news stories (in case you've been living under a rock and don't know what I'm talking about).  Happy International Women's day!  Would be lovely to think we could rest on the hard work of women's rights advocates of the past few decades, but it is apparent that that is not the case.  

Dear Republicans:
Keep your legislation out
of my vagina.

state of Virginia
wishes to rape its women
with foreign objects
(same article as above; see third paragraph)

if Rachel Maddow
said anything half so bad
she'd be fired post-haste

read the news, you'd think
that embryos are people
but women are not


Women's rights - to family planning, to education, to the pursuit of happiness, be it work or unpaid work at home - are not a political issue.  They are an issue of civilization.  A society that undermines and attacks its women is doomed.  


Haiku #159 - Vogons

on the phone again
with my health insurance co
it's such a racket


Anyone who knows me knows how much I hate administrivia.  I am offended by cleaning, cooking, sleeping, showering, paying bills, making routine phone calls - anything that has to be done repeatedly just to keep life chugging along.  My own neurotic problem.  


But seriously, why can't my health insurance company automate my monthly payment without a ton of hassle and snail mail?  SNAIL MAIL!  I ask you.  They are the only company I do business with with whom snail mail is the most convenient way to take care of billing.  It's an inefficient way of doing business.  PLEASE, take my tax dollars and centralize this sh*t, so that the kind man who helped me on the phone can get laid off and be forced to find something more useful and creative to do with his life.  

Haiku #158 - Wifi (or Not)

when watching movies
on bad wifi connection
don't choose a myst'ry!

Our bus has wifi, but it isn't usually fast enough to watch videos streaming.  I spent a long time yesterday trying, with limited success, to indulge my new addiction to Foyle's War during our bus ride to Macomb, IL.  We have a show here tonight, then on to Columbia, MO and Fayetteville, AR!

Haiku #157 - Keyboard drama!

opening number
Keyboard 1 loses power
I got your back, Kurt

Yesterday matinee was an interesting beginning!  Luckily these type of things happen quite rarely, and our heroic sound people had it fixed quickly enough that we didn't have to stop the show.  I cobbled together both the keyboard parts for a few measures til we were fully functional.  What a way to wake up!

Haiku #152-4 - Sonnet

I've missed a posting a few days recently, so today, I will catch you up with a haiku each from Kurt, Cherie, and me, and a sonnet for good measure.  This is how we entertain ourselves during long bus trips.  Missouri overnight tonight, then Friday and Saturday nights, shows in Lincoln, NE!

I spy with my eye
something red and crescent-shaped
it is on the bus
-Cherie

(Yes, we played "I spy" via text-haikus.  Incidentally, it was the red handle to the escape hatch at the top of the bus.)

the Midwest is big
Haikus can get lost out here
free-range syllables
-Kurt

in this vast prairie
haikus turn into sonnets
that'll shut us up
-me

Sonnet #1 - Ode to Brilliant Friends

A long day on the bus I feared could cause
a numbing of the mind and of the ass.
I greeted six a.m. with no applause
And soon my phone began to me harass.

As if alarm had not been pain enough,
The texts began to pile up thick and deep.
Kurt and Cherie were riffing off the cuff, 
A clear result of brains on little sleep.

The bus's wheels went on their countless rounds
As Thursday's sun arrived to the Midwest
No subject for haiku was out of bounds
In fact, I think we wrote some of our best. 

The moral - brilliant friends will help you find:
The bus will numb the ass but not the mind.


Haiku #150 - Springfield, OH

The unfortunate thing about one-nighters is that there's very little time to see the places where we perform.  So, sometimes I have to haiku about what I have time to notice.


There is a really cute coffee shop across from the hotel, and I had a nice jog before soundcheck.  And...


look at the sidewalks
must be bird migration route
and here's the rest stop


Sorry, Springfield! Hopefully I'll have time to see more than your sidewalks next time I come through!

Haiku #147 - Muncie, IN

We couldn't see them
from the deep pit, but we could
hear them laugh and cheer


Ball State University tonight, and the pit was really low, so we couldn't see the audience (nor were they even close enough to peer in at us as if we were zoo animals, as has happened at some recent venues) - but they were a really rambunctious crowd and seemed to like the show a lot.  


On to Kalamazoo in the morning!